Friday, January 18, 2008

draft

spider-webbed ice grows
and branches bleed white across
frozen arteries

9 comments:

SB said...

I like this, as a poem, but not as a haiku.

One of the characteristics of haiku is that it does not use metaphor.

I just call mine "small poems" and avoid the whole issue.

But you might want to check out my haiku links, under POETRY LINKS on the Watermark sidebar, or on my 's m a l l p o e m s' site.

susan said...

SB,I hear you. haiku is more than many of us mistake it to be. I'm cool with 'small poem' and thanks for the references.

pia said...

It might be a small poem but it left me thinking--know it's a metaphor yet was actually trying to visualize it

The metaphor was better :)

Anna said...

What a beautiful blog! I like the layout and it has a unique style of writing to it. I have given you a link on Free Poems and I would be very happy if you would like to link back.

susan said...

Thank you for your kind words and the link, Anna. I'm happy to link to Free Poems.

Michele L. Tune - Writing the Cyber Highway said...

I felt the power of these few words.

Thanks for sharing, Susan!

Good job. ;-)

Smiles,
Michele

writerwoman said...

I love the way the picture and the words work in unison. It's really breathtaking.

Deborah Vatcher said...

This is beautiful, especially in tandem with the photo. Thank you for your comments on my poetry blog!
Snake's Poetry

...deb said...

"branches bleed " captured me and set the whole alive.