Saturday, September 20, 2008

haiku

dreams clawed open- wide
pomegranate seeds tumbling out
sticky dye stains grin




*This weeks prompt at One Single Impression is autumn. Visit OSI to read more responses.

19 comments:

Geraldine said...

excellent! great imagery here.

www.mypoeticpath.wordpress.com

Deborah Godin said...

Love this - it captures exactly the essence of experiencing the fruit all over!

Beloved Dreamer said...

I just love this simple and yet complex look of the continuance of hope after the death that fall brings and the ice prison to come..
Well done..............


love-bd

SandyCarlson said...

There is a great reward in waiting for the fruit to ripen and then making the most of every bit of it! Thanks, Susan.

Julie said...

That first line is chocked full of complexity: "dreams clawed open wide". It is as though Spring and Summer are idyllic times but there is always going to be a reckoning, and Autumn is the beginning of that. We get to see inside to the reality before the cold times of self-assessment set in.

Interesting to contemplate the many and varied meanings that line behind the complexity of your first line.

I like this ...

Raven said...

Delightful picture you have painted. I can see and feel the experience.

anthonynorth said...

That was certainly utilising every last bit of goodness.

Pam said...

What complex imagery in this poem. Full of sensuousness and lovely to contemplate.

JP/deb said...

I love this & want to go out and buy a pomengranate right now! JP/deb

Jim said...

Hi Susan, yes it is that time. I don't eat those pomegranate seeds but many do.
Ours around here are wild. These seeds can be made into the spice, anardana. Which in turn is used in making Indian cuisine. I'll have to ask my son-in-law if he uses this spice.
..

Jade said...

oOoo...super connection between dreams and pomergranate seeds.

tumblewords said...

Interesting take on the prompt! Enjoyable read!

susan said...

Julie,
You see so much that I believe
bubbled in my subconscious. What I consciously did was reach back to my childhood. It was after I found the image that meaning began to surface.

Jim,
I love Indian food. Eat it as often as I can.

Thanks all for taking time to read and comment.

fourwindshaiga said...

A differnt view of autumn, but I like it.

alotus-poetry said...

This is lovely and dark red vivid!! I was thinking of red wine when you mentioned pomegranate, but then you you said "seeds tumbling out," that makes the haiku itself move. Great imagery!! :) I <3 this haiku!

Also, thank you so much for visiting my poetry journal!! :)

qualcosa di bello said...

the stain of one's dreams can be a beautiful thing to wear

Teri C said...

I love the thoughts that came to mind when I read your beautiful poem.

susan said...

Thanks all for the close reads. Not only have you expressed you enjoy it but why and the why is a biggie for me. I look forward to reading and commenting more at your sites in the future as well.

Beth P. said...

Thanks, Susan for this word-picture!

I fell all sticky!

Just for the confessional: this morning very early I took a peach, ready to fall off a tree, (I'm sure of it) while taking a long walk with the dog. It was the most delicious sin I've had in a long time!

Thanks--and thanks for stopping by my post on this prompt.