Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Confession Tuesday

Today I'm following January's lead. I've hit some rough patches. If you've read here earlier, you know the Liar book controversy was intense, and I confess I bit into the issue like a pit bull. I would not let go. I got so wound up, it took a friend to help me back away from the issue. I'm grateful I didn't go sistergirl. And trust me, I came close.

I need a car. I cannot afford a car, but reality is despite my finances, I have to make it work and I'm really, really tired of making it work. Can anyone relate?

I have two daughters. I love them both, but they are girls. They are siblings with a significant age gap. One is a teenager. Can you tell where there is going? Of course, each expects me to take the side of the other and no matter how diplomatic and unbiased I try to be, both feel betrayed. Yes, nothing less than betrayed. Their mother has failed them again. I have failed to understand where she is coming from. ((sigh))

The upside: I'm mentoring two fantastic young women. Please check out Ari at Reading In Color and Tashi at Taste Life Twice. And if by off chance you know my daughters, please don't mention the mentees. It would not be good. Fortunately, while my daughters are proud of what I do, they pay more attention to their lives so I don't expect them to see this. Maude knows the guilt-trippping I'd get behind bragging about somebody else.

8 comments:

rhapsodyinbooks said...

I wish I had something constructive to say, besides that I am rooting for you! I get that tired feeling too. And I know it doesn't do much to have other people say, hang in there, or I sympathize/empathize or whatever, so I feel pretty helpless in that regard. But I at least wanted to send some love your way, just in case it makes a little difference!

Taste Life Twice said...

I know exactly how your daughters feel. Just think, I was 5 when my sister was 13 and 8 when my sister was 16. All we did was argue! And you're right, each of us felt nothing less than betrayed. Don't worry too much, though. Once they get older, they'll look back and laugh about it. My sister and I get along just fine now that we're older.

It's nice to be the upside, but yeah I know how your daughters would feel. I think I'd be the same way if my mom had mentees.

~Tashi

susan said...

Thanks Tashi,
At least I know I'm not completely off-base.

Rhapsody, there's no magic words but being heard helps. Thank you.

zettaelliott said...

Can't help with the parenting thing 'cause I'm not a mom and still have serious mother issues myself...but I think you should remarkable restraint with the LIAR uproar and you turned a moment of disgust into a REAL "teachable moment!" more than one blogger I've talked to plans to review more POC b/c of YOUR list & challenge/invitation...so give yourself some credit for that!

Marjolein said...

Thank you for your comment on my review blog Susan! Your blog is great! love that you are reviewing books between cultures too, I will start following your blog from now on!

Doret said...

I am with Zetta, Susan, you did great, I enjoyed reading your comments everywhere I went, especially @ the authors blog.

pia said...

My sister and I still argue and argue and...so I'm the worst person to give advice on this

I can relate to trying to make it work more than you can imagine

Thanks for the wonderful comment :) Though a doctor called me a Legal addict when I tried getting him to sign off on rehab he laughed

Anonymous said...

life sucks sometimes for some, not at all for many, and most of the time for others. i can relate to "I have to make it work and I'm really, really tired of making it work." sometimes, it feels it's all i do, hermana. un abrazo!

your pit bull efforts are admirable. what concerned me was that you were giving the book far too much attention/buzz. i admire your courage and hope to keep hearing your voice ringing loud! don't shush up! we need brave women like you.

i recommend that you send your daughters to volunteer one week at a children's hospital with kids dying of leukemia, etc. they might come back changed and see how good they've really got it with each other and with you.

Mayra