Thursday, May 14, 2009

3WW: Streaking

So I’m sittin’ there watching Trisha the newsgirl with the great set of headlights when, “BOOM”! I bolt out the back door and standing there looking both nervous and happier than an alley cat caught with a rat in its mouth, is Leonard staring up at white streak in the sky.

“Boy, what the….”

“Hey, Pop. Remember last week when you came out here and asked me who I was bickerin’ with and I told you I was talking to myself- that’s how I process. I was frustrated because I having trajectory problems. And you said, "Son, shoot, don’t take a genius to figure that out." You were right. I’ve been out here working at it and sure enough turned out it was a minor glitch in the fuel line. These fine hands, Pop, worked it out. Tonight, my rocket lit up the sky!”

“Alright Boy genius, great, wash up and get in here for dinner.”

Every week, Thom gives up three words for 3WW. This week we had to use: bicker, nervous, trajectory. In spirit of my current discussion with Doret about Dr. Truelove I came up with this. To read other contributions, go here.

16 comments:

ThomG said...

It's fresh, fun vibrant with some really great whimsy - right up my alley. I really like this.

susan said...

Thanks, Thom.

Kristy Worden said...

Cute - liked the title...thought it was funny to go with 'these fine hands' instead of 'this fine brain' after the genius comment... but maybe this is a continuation of something and I don't know the backstory... anyway, fun little read..good for Leonard!

susan said...

Hi Kristy, one of my weakness is that I don't normally create any backstory. Usually I'm combining Thom's word choices with something I recently read. In this case, it's the YA novel, The Making of Dr. Truelove. I story that is about a young teen's insecurities about sex and romance. I think it's a bit crass and could have had a lighter touch. A friend thinks it's fine the way it is.

MichaelO said...

So, Trisha is riding Leonard's rocket and traveling at the speed of light. She then turns on her headlights. Does she see any light? ;>)

Sorry, I couldn't resist. Fun little story! Headlights and rockets reminded me of a similar question a physics professor proposed while discussing Einstein's theories of relativity. The answer of course is no. No because her "headlights" do not produce visible light. Or no, if they did produce light, because the speed of light is absolute and nothing can travel faster than it. That was a wild tangent! Thanks Susan!

PS: If we take the erotic implication of the question, she would probably see stars and/or fireworks. So the answer then is YES!

Daily Panic said...

I think you captured a teen very well.
Thanks for your kind words!

anthonynorth said...

Sharply written and fun. Enjoyed this.

susan said...

Michael, you are funny. Daily and Anthony, thanks for coming by and commenting.

Tammy said...

Delightful little story.

Ann (bunnygirl) said...

I love the fun and pacing of this. I didn't find it particularly crass.

Check out this nanofiction site: http://nanofiction.org/

They do regular print runs (I was just reading one earlier today) and they have a contest under way. You should send them something. You seem to have a knack for uber-short stories.

susan said...

Hi Ann, My aim was to avoid being crass. I'm not a prude but do think there needs to balance and effectiveness. It's like the F word. It's become so common it's lost a lot of its bite.And that's my problem with crass. Over-the-top profanity, sexual innuendo runs the risk of not only being crass but ineffective. Thanks for the contest information.

MichaelO said...

Susan - I have to laugh, the moment after I sent my comment with the suggestive supposition I saw your comments regarding crassness. I thought, OOPS! I'm relieved you were amused. : )

susan said...

Michael, yep. I was amused and I'm not easily offended. I live with a very boy, Man. LOL I need to write my review of Dr. Truelove so folks have a better sense of where I stand.

Tumblewords: said...

A fine read!

gautami tripathy said...

Enjoyed reading it. You do have a knack for short fiction.

unfocussed

Andy Sewina said...

Yeah, liked the line about the minor glitch in the feul line!