Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Confession Tuesday

Ah, confession time. It's fall and I'm looking forward to new beginnings. That's not my confession; my confession is that I've realized it takes me a lot longer to accept change and to adapt despite my belief that I am open-minded and flexible. Clearly I'm not as much of either as I thought. I've been angry and sad for awhile because of some very difficult changes in my life this year. I became so fixated on what I no longer had and what I could no longer do that I failed to put my energy into what I could do and on what I do have. Well, I've finally got off the pity pot. I was seriously at risk for getting sores from sitting so long.

As some of you know, despite my lack, I was light when it came to pounds and the extra weight was increasing my risk for my family history of diabetes, high blood pressure and heart disease. I've lost twenty pounds. Yay, me. However, the reality is I have twenty more to go. At the moment all I'm losing is stamina not so much that I'm no longer watching what I eat, but I've hit a plateau. I don't have the same enthusiasm. Frankly, I don't want to plan my meals and count points (Weight Watchers system instead of counting calories) but I have too if I want my weight loss to continue a downward spiral. The upside is I now have a wardrobe I can actually wear instead of just staring at.

Lastly, staring at my slimmer, naked self in the mirror this morning, I conceded my boobs are heading south. I felt a tinge of guilt and regret. I'm the only woman in my family who actually has a sizable pair and I failed to harness and care for my girls. I was alternately too lazy or too cheap to get fitted for a good bra. I wonder if I have time to slow down the descent.


January said...

I think you're too hard on yourself. It's not easy to lose weight but you've lost 20 pounds. That's quite an accomplishment.

Do you have a friend or family member you can work out with? What about starting a new routine or activity? These are all things I have to start doing to get my workout routine back on track.

Good luck!

susan said...

I walk with my guy, but with my knee not completely healed, I'm limited how far and how often. Looking at getting a new dvd and I joined a group that will be sharing how well it's going.

I'm not sure I'm too hard but I do need to take a breath and trust I can do this. Thanks.

I really appreciate you always coming by.

Mel (He Followed Me Home) said...

Susan, 20 lbs is an amzing feat in itself so a big congrats on getting there! Maybe change things up a bit, and heck even a short walk is better then no walk at all ;)

As for change, maybe its the mid 30's creeping up on me as I'm there too? I realize that if I want something changed, I need to do it - sorta like I control my destiny :) Be active & strive for what you want & avoid the things that take away from your goals.

The boobage issue is a whole new ballgame I'm just discovering - even with my lil guys it's happening so don't feel too bad! There's no way to beat gravity 24/7.

Have a great week!

Jodie said...

I agree with january 20 pounds is mega, well done. And just think how much money you're saving by wearing that wardrobe. Good achievements and changes.

Starting a new activity is probably the best way to keep motivated, because you're probably stuck in an exercise rut and finding some new food combos could help too. Even new music while you exercise might help.

Bonnie Jacobs said...

You've been missing far too long from the blogosphere. I miss you.

Fanzine Episódio Cultural said...


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...And the tempest falls again,
Carrying in its womb
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A fruit of a new sin,
Disagreement of a new age...

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This is a translated excerpt of my poem & short tales book (O Anjo e a
Tempestade) aka (The Angel and the Storm)

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-blessed holy socks, the non-perishable-zealot said...

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Unknown said...

A strong man will struggle with the storms of fate.
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